The things women do to look good. I know, this is not a new thought. But when a team of women are working you over at beauty's equivalent of a pit stop at the Indy 500, it certainly crosses your mind.
As soon as I walk in, the Korean women look at me, nod, and start making motions at each other. They know what I need. Twenty seconds later I'm in a chair, my feet soaking in a tub of warm water, one hand soaking on the table, and a cushion behind my head so I can lean back and get the eyebrows under control. One woman starts carving away the cuticles around my toenails, another applies hot wax above my eyes, a third saws away at my fingernails.
The entire time, they're talking in a language I can't begin to understand. In the background, a Korean movie is playing - some cheesy crime drama that looks like the cheapest soap opera you've ever seen - and I truly feel like the whitest person on the planet (which I may well be).
When I hear the woman attacking my eyebrows make a clucking sound, I know what it means. She's decided the stray hairs on my face have to go. I know she's right (those hairs plague me like you wouldn't believe), but that means more hot wax and the endless ripping of little cloth strips. After the ripping comes the plucking, and this woman won't rest until my face is ready for prime time.
Thirty dollars later, I stumble back out into the sunshine, and I feel presentable. A little bit dazed, but presentable.
Why have I gone through this? Because this is what women do to prepare for a date. I don't care which gender you're dating - this is the routine.
Okay, it's 7:15, and now I need to go enter Phase II of the pre-date regimen: hair and makeup. I'll be back later to report on how things went.
*******************
1:06 a.m.
The Date went fine. Natalie is interesting, funny, sharp - and ridiculously hot at 46 years old. Online dating is generally a case of people not living up to their online/telephone banter and pictures ... but I have to say, Natalie exceeded expectations. If anything, I thought this might be an instance where I'd be the one on the short end of the dating stick - I was fully prepared to hear the "I'm just not feeling that vibe" speech instead of give it.
That's not how things went - she was flirtatious and attentive and all that ... but something still felt slightly off. We had a couple of glasses of wine, we talked, we listened to music ... but there was something strange about the dynamic. The best way I can explain it is to say that while she was definitely into me, it was almost like I wasn't there - or that it didn't matter who I was. It felt like sport.
I don't know, maybe I just need to sleep on it. Maybe I'll have some fresh perspective in the morning. But right now, the whole evening - despite being festive and flirty - feels somehow hollow at the center.
4 comments:
Where do you get toes and nails and waxing done for $30?? Referral, please.
At least now I know why you haven't returned my call:)
Don't most first dates with strangers feel hollow at the center? I don't see how they could be otherwise. That doesn't mean, though, that as things move along they won't deepen.
Correct me if I'm wrong about that, though - I've never dated online, so it's unfamiliar territory.
ESM
I agree with ESM. First dates with strangers feel odd because they're artificial.
Who IS this person? Why are we playing this game? Why am I here?
Give her a chance to become a familiar friend.
Mom
PS. I would lose the red toenail polish. I've never met anyone whose toes are so beautiful that they should become a focal point.
I *like* the red toenail polish. Though I alternate between polished toes and au naturel, I think a little color makes feet look more fun and/or elegant, depending on the color and the shoe. Although I've never in my life had a pedicure (or a manicure), which is something I hope to remedy someday.
ESM
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